The Seal of Sigmund - Flame On campaigning in Vercuso again!

The Rhyme of the Ancient Marinader
by Sam Tailor-Coal
(also known as Cormorant Rams-Eye )

To be a sous chef on a ship
Is not for the faint hearted
But that was where I found myself
And where this rhyme is started

Bretonnians love the Moot’s fine food
And pay a handsome salary
And so we sailed from harbour safe
With flour and oil and celery

It was not long before supplies
Of meat began to lull
And so I took my trusty bow
On deck to shoot a gull

With my short-bow I shot
A bird so large I could not miss
I thought it was a cormorant
But they call it ‘albatriss’

We marinaded it for days
In wine and herbs and spices
And served it in the captian’s mess
In tender dainty slices

‘What meat is this?’ the captain asked
‘Its taste is new to me’
‘Tis cormorant’ said I, ‘that flies
Above the surging sea’

But sailors know their seabirds well
And what the portents say
‘This is no cormorant!’ they cried
‘Its pinions are grey!’

‘Thou hast served up an albatross!’
Cried captain, mate and crew
‘Disaster on us all you brought
when albatross you slew!’

‘Ah, wretch’ said they, ‘the bird to slay
that made the breeze to blow!’
And as they warned, the sea was calmed
And the ship it did not go

Day after day, day after day
We stuck, nor breath nor motion
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean

Bread ran short, and fruit and veg
And wine and ale and water
And as we sat becalmed and still
Supplies were getting shorter

Water, water, everywhere,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, everywhere,
Nor any drop to drink.

The halfings’ hunger was intense
Our poor starved tummies rumbled
For by my eager archery
We all alike were humbled

At last the currents drew us near
The island of Sartosa
And there the captain had his men
Cast all the halflings over –

– board. We swam ashore to find
An old and dirty quay
Vercuso was the harbour’s name
A haven from the sea

The tides and currents split us up
We knew not who was saved
When my small group was washed ashore
Upon the murky waves

I found myself with Haricot
The best cook on the ship,
Young Oliver and Leon and
The thief called Dick Turnip

We also had two hobbit scouts
Who’d saved their precious bows
And soon we found a herd of pigs
With piglets, boars and sows

No sooner had we come ashore
Than orcs and goblins found us
We fled among the buildings while
The piggies fought them for us

Four other bands we came across
Orcs, men, elves and undead
We hid up in a building tall –
I did not lose my head!

We sent the pigs to fight their dogs
A wall we hid behind
The scouts shot true from high above
‘Gainst vampire and his kind