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 A shockingly short BatRep

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Toby Goatfield
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PostSubject: A shockingly short BatRep   Sun 14 Mar 2010 - 20:58

The day began with the questionably moral Middenheimers sneaking about and spying some wyrdstone. Using their skills from years of stalking sheep on the mountainside, they rushed towards an unsuspecting building. They used the rain to prevent the noble Reiklanders from using their blackpowder weapons (well...that's what the official report will say). They ran towards a building, cowering behind walls and cover to reach it. The noble Reiklanders (that's my team) were unable to find a clear shot at the scoundrels. Scoundrels? Does anyone even use that word anymore? They managed to make it to the dilapidated building, but were unsure how to reach the top, as there were no stairs, remains of stairs, improvised ladders, nor did the Middenheimers bring any rope & hooks. First rule of Mordheim, let the red shirt go first. Second rule of Mordheim, bring rope and hooks. So they had to do it the old fashioned way, they climbed up by their own well moistoned hands and feet.



Then as the battle heated up, the cowardly dogs (Middenheimers) ambushed the noble and valient Reiklander Youngbloods. After dispatching them in a most horrendous and skull-crushing manner, they tried to pull an "Angry Uncle" move on a brave Reiklander Champion. Far too smart to fall for the "You vant some candy lil kinder?" trick, the wise Reiklander Champion ran away from the Middenheimer Captain with the zwei hander (two hander) and his cohort in crime carrying a still bloody hammer. They turned their attentions on a humble henchman and pummeled the Drakwald Archer in the service of the the Reiklanders into a gelatenous goo. The sweaty Middenheimer captain sighed and pointed to a fresh zombie hanging, "Well at least der is someone who von't run away."



The cowardly dogs hired archers and crossbowmen who stole a page from the Reiklander playbook of "Best places to position your henchmen that use missile weapons" and placed them in the upper floors of a building that overlooked a few city blocks. Had the brave Reiklanders been given a fair chance to fight on the battelground or not been lulled into regrouping while fighting a rearguard action on the flanks and the front, the Reiklanders would have won. The battle may have been short, but the campaign will be long.



Last edited by Toby Goatfield on Sun 14 Mar 2010 - 21:09; edited 1 time in total
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Toby Goatfield
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PostSubject: Re: A shockingly short BatRep   Sun 14 Mar 2010 - 20:59

Hope something (anything) from this made you smile. Cool
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mweaver
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PostSubject: Re: A shockingly short BatRep   Sun 14 Mar 2010 - 23:09

Good luck with the revenge thing!

Why does that archer have a green bow? Doesn't he know that bow staves should be seasoned.

Reiklanders are perhaps my favorite warband. Do us proud!
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Toby Goatfield
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PostSubject: Re: A shockingly short BatRep   Sun 14 Mar 2010 - 23:13

Oh, it's laminated to blend in with all the redwoods of the Drakwald forest.

(And between just you and me, if anything could have gone wrong for my Reiklanders in that game, it did. My guys wussed out at the first opportunity, but don't tell anyone. I don't want anyone on the board to know, you know how other Mordheim Captains get.....)

Revenge is patient - Gotrek
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DeafNala
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PostSubject: Re: A shockingly short BatRep   Wed 17 Mar 2010 - 2:30

COOL report & equally COOL photos! I still use "scoundrels", usually in reference to myself...it's a better term than some of the more accurate descriptions of moi. Keep posting...an EXCELLENT READ!
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dwi
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PostSubject: Re: A shockingly short BatRep   Wed 17 Mar 2010 - 8:05

Indeed! Not the longest one I have ever read but still well done man
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Toby Goatfield
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PostSubject: Re: A shockingly short BatRep   Wed 17 Mar 2010 - 17:54

Whew, I'm glad you guys liked it. For a bit I was worried pale I hope to play soon and within a week will post a real battle report for your enjoyment. I didn't realize my camera took such good pics, ignore the crap painting (said while making strange Jedi hand gestures at the screen). And yes, my future ex-wife will be Serinda Swan and yes, I'm a pig
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PostSubject: Re: A shockingly short BatRep   Today at 9:25

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